Fast Forward...

So again, let's face the fact that I am clearly a horrible blogger that keeps you hanging on for months on end with no updates! I PROMISE to keep this story going as best I can with the new life we have coming our way. I know I will be 2x busier, but for the sake of memories and my own sanity to get things out of my head and off my heart, this blog is like therapy for me! So here we go! AGAIN...

Woke up this morning, with a call into the hospital at 5am to check in for my delivery. Sundays are considered a turn around day (I assume like at a hotel) and they are all booked up until later today. I have been fasting since 9pm and I can't go much longer without food in my system so to be nice to my husband (I get HANGRY real quick) we have decided tomorrow will be a better day for us all!

This being said, I feel like I've been given one last chance to make the best of the day! So for the next 24 hours I will take it all in and enjoy this last day of being a tribe of 3!

Hubby and Harp are still upstairs snoozing and I'm enjoying the stillness of my living room, got my CMT video countdown on in the background (which is rare since Ty isn't a country music fan), a load of towels in the laundry smelling the house up oh so good and making my list of things to delegate to do while Im in the hospital. 

This whole process has been a whirlwind. Just when we thought we had life figured out and on somewhat of a schedule.. those two pink lines showed up again! Weird how that happens. (We celebrated our first wedding anniversary which is on Valentines Day and nine months later here we are) Do the math. 

I again have been super lucky to have had another amazing pregnancy. I didn't have any morning sickness or anything to really slow me down. If you know me, you know I am always 90 to nothing all day, errr' day! I don't really have a choice with lil miss Harper Rose running our lives! In fact there were times I would forget I was pregnant and wonder why I was SO exhausted at the end of the day! These last couple weeks have slowed me down a little with the horrible, awful, no good sciatic nerve flaring up. (That thing is NO JOKE and will make you STOP in your tracks to sit down and just breathe it out) Also, just the whole hip expansion, changing bra sizes every month, the pee sneezes and emotions. (My poor husband, he will never understand that sometimes I just need a good cry, stop asking WHY cause I don't know!) 

This lil boy, Beckham Bradley Holmes will be the perfect addition to our crazy life. Ty is so so so so so so so so so excited to have his boy to play baseball with and take fishing! He keeps saying "I can't believe we are gonna have a mini "ME"! "   

Prayers for a safe and easy (as can be) induction tomorrow are appreciated! I won't lie, I'm extremely excited, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared out of my mind to start this next chapter. I try to be a planner and that has been something I have struggled with. Kids don't allow for much "planning". They dictate what, when and how you are going to do things. So I've learned to take things day by day, communicate with my husband better and just enjoy the ride! Here we go! AGAIN.

Rewind...

So if you follow along, let me first just apologize for not updating this bad boy since ummmm, my first pregnancy... LAST YEAR! I even had to have the site resend me my password, cause I forgot it! Proof that mommy life keeps you busy! Figured before I catch you all up on life lately, I'll show off some of my favorite pics from the last couple months! 

To say she has us wrapped around her fingers (all 10 of them) is an understatement! 

Our fearless Harper Rose.

She will never know how much I truly LOVE her! 

My partner in crime, My teammate, My best friend, My Rock, My Husband.  

She is SO EXCITED to be a Big Sister and is OBSESSED with my growing belly! She loves to pull my shirt up (in public) and give brother LOVE!

Life with this little girl is so awesome! She has taught me so much in the past year and pushed me to become a stronger more confident person! I know it's so cliche' but kids change your life in the most amazing ways! Makes you look at things in a total different viewpoint and realize whats REALLY Important!

MOM LIFE

Lemme tell ya about the mom life thus far....

     First off.. I'm gonna give myself some credit and say that I'm pretty good at this. I guess being the oldest of three girls, I've always had this motherly instinct. Harper is not only my "mini me" with her head full of hair, but she is super alert and active. I love her little button nose and open mouth slobber kisses. SO MUCH.. Like I could eat her! (weird, I know.. but I seriously love her that much)

     Post delivery I felt great. I was back on my feet quicker than I thought I'd be. Of course the jumbo pads and leaky breasts are just a tad annoying, but all part of it. During delivery I tore a little bit and needed 3 small stitches which was fine, but no one warned me about the "pregnancy down there after care". 

     To any new/soon to be moms I recommend you prepare your bathroom with these items: Super absorbency pads (WITH wings), Dermoplast (pain relieving spray) for the burning sensation down there after you pee (that was THE worst). If you are breast feeding, Lanolin cream for chapped nipples, the gel pads from target ( I swear by these!! Heat for 30 sec and put over breasts 5 min before feeding/pumping), nursing pads for leaky nipples, and an easy access nursing bra. Last but not least, lavender oil to relax and soothe you at night before bed.

     My breast feeding experience wasn't what I hoped it would be. I went into this thinking "Ok, I can do this, it cant be that hard"! I feel like the moms of the world today feel SUPER pressured into breast feeding and obviously doing what best for the baby. Harper didn't have a good latch onto my nipple and it was horrible! You guys, I'm not kidding. AWFUL. She felt like a piranha and had such a hard suck. I was ok in the hospital the first two days after she was born, but when I got home it was a whole different story.

 My milk came in and my breast were GI-NORM... I would cry crocodile tears every time it was time to feed. I had to tell myself to push thru the pain and remember that this was the best thing I could do for my baby girl. She fed every 3 hours or so, I would switch from left to right breast and I even had this super great app on my phone that would alert you when it was time to feed. After the first whole week of breast feeding I was still unhappy with the process and I started feeling down on myself.. I pulled myself outta this slump and realized it wasn't worth postpartum feelings because of the pain and frustration. So I sent my mother in law to the store for formula and Waaa-laaahhh happy baby. After her first bottle she slept for a solid 3 hours and was way more content than she had been the last couple days. 

And so it begins...

HOME SWEET HOME

FIRST BATH 

FIRST SMILE

 BLESSED WITH SO MUCH LOVE

Harper's Birth Story

     Oh hayyyyy... Welcome Welcome... I know I am SUPER behind and SO much LIFE has happened since my last post, but this whole "mom thing" doesn't allow for much downtime to sit and write my life story. I'm no Carrie Bradshaw, but I really do enjoy this and I promise to not let so much time pass between posts. (scouts honor) So without further procrastination.... My delivery story 6 weeks too late:

What had happened was...

     My "40 week" appointment was Thursday August 7th .. and I just knew Dr. Ramos was going to say "Well, Ash..Hope you brought your bags, you are ready to go.. lets admit you"!! Instead, he gave me the whole "you look great, lets just wait and let it happen naturally" speech. Tyler was totally on board with waiting and me.. well, I threw a fit and cried when he left the exam room.

     Later that day my group text was blowing up with the "Well, what did he say? Is it go time?" Once I told them the news they all jokingly advised me to eat a greasy pizza or to have sex... Ummm yea.. I was only in the mood for ONE of these.. you guessed it.. bring on the PIZZA!

     Fast forward to 4am Friday morning.. the feeling I had been waiting on for 9 months.. I remember asking everyone, "..But what do contractions feel like"? .. and each response, "When you know you KNOW" .. let's just say I KNEW! I woke up with lower back pain and felt the need to poop standing up.. (I didn't, of course) But laying in bed, on my back was the last thing I wanted to do. 

I got up and did some laps in my bathroom, pacing back and forth taking deep breaths.. I began to feel normal again. Maybe I just needed some water. I went downstairs and both sisters were asleep on the couch (sister slumber party) as soon as they heard me, they popped up and said "WHATS WRONG"?! They could tell I was trying to keep my cool. I did a couple more laps in the kitchen and the contractions started again. I had to sit and felt the need to push.. Ty came downstairs with my bags and said "Ok babe, I called the hospital and I think we should go". I was SO nervous!! 

We made it to Texas Women's Hospital in like 15 min since it was 4:30am and no one was on the road (that was another fear of mine.. being in rush hour traffic while in labor) We parked, they wheeled me up and I had pre-registered so I went straight to a room. All the while the contractions made me just wanna scream and cuss.They lasted about 3 min each and were coming more often. 

This next part, I'm told I am really LUCKY to have experienced without a drop of sweat. 

     I was cozy in my bed, hooked up to the IV. My mom, sisters and mother in law had all got there and were taking turns coming in my room since they only allow 3 people in at a time. Tyler was feeding me ice chips and rubbing my head. The nurse checked my dilation  (when I got to the hospital it was 2cm) and it was at 6cm. The look on her face was surprised as she told me "Ok, you are dilating pretty quickly so don't mind me as I run around frantically to prepare this room for your delivery". She called the anesthesiologist to come for my epidural (which was AWESOME). Within 10 minutes of getting the epidural I was at 10cm. and feelin like a champ! She had me roll over from my side and set up in the stirrups. We did about 3 practice pushes before she said "Lets stop pushing now cause I can see her hair coming out!! (you can imagine the look on my face!!) I'm going to have them notify Dr. Ramos and as soon as he gets here we will have this baby"! Dr. Ramos walked in 5 minuted later and it was showtime.

     I had said from the beginning that I didn't want Tyler "down there watching" He was instructed (by me)  to stay above my knees helping me push probably while I yelled obscene things at him (like they do in the movies, right?!) However, he was so in the moment he said "Babe, this is such a beautiful thing, I cant help but watch" and 5 pushes later our sweet baby girl was out. 

Seriously SO easy! 

Thoughts from my Heart...

     I am absolutely obsessed with blogs and peoples' opinions on things and how they view life.. This specific one touched my heart this morning. I am a lil' emotional as I sit at my work desk for the last time before I start maternity leave next week. I realize that my life is about to change and I will just have to take things day by day. I have been in a place of "In Between" both emotionally and physically. My old self, My new self.. My old Life.. My new life.. trying to balance with one foot in each world. It's exhausting.... Not knowing what the future holds. I know it's going to be beautiful, but geezzzeee I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared outta my mind. I am so thankful and blessed to have a supportive group of friends and family literally waiting on standby for the "event of the year"! (Harper's arrival) Please take the time to read this blog (just click the link) and take it all in.. As women we feel the need to not only have it all together but KEEP it all together! This reminds us that
"It's going to be ok"...

http://www.scissortailsilk.com/2014/07/21/what-you-probably-need-to-hear-the-most-right-now/

37 Weeks

37 Weeks Today: Friday July 24th

"Well, she is running outta room in there! Looks like you are about 3cm dilated and Harper has a strong heartbeat..  Have you noticed or felt anything different? As of now we still just wait until she is ready. Could be any day... Again, make sure you have the car seat properly installed and your bags in the car, ready to go "

-Dr. Ramos

Weighing in at 127 lbs.. and normal blood pressure I still feel energized. My feet are swelling more so at the end of my day and my ring doesn't fit anymore! : (  Ty has been helping me out alot around the house and cooking dinner for me. There is still a ton I wanna do to her nursery, but I have convinced myself not to stress over it because she won't be in there for a while anyways! Hospital bags are packed and ready.. All my cute pjs are washed and ready for when I get home. All her clothes are washed and hung up.. and here we are.. just waiting.
To be continued.....